... It Goes On

I spent the whole day today thinking about Heath Ledger. Not in a morbid, TMZ, stalker kind of way. But thinking about the people who are affected by his loss and how those people are now having to share their grief with millions of people who never met him.

It must be horrible to be a celebrity. Think about it. Acting, singing, entertaining, athletics - those are jobs, just like mine. Granted, mine is less well-paid and doesn't seem like as much as fun as those, but they're jobs. And I think, from reading articles today about Heath Ledger, that even acting and singing and entertaining must suck from time to time. To be really good, like HL or Daniel Day Lewis or Charlize Theron, you have to immerse yourself completely into the role and live it. And clearly some of those people struggle with that and with coming out of it. Clearly, HL struggled if there were anti-depressants and anti-anxiety pills and sleeping medication in his home.

But the horrible things about celebrity - being followed by the paparazzi, losing all your privacy, etc. - must make your job worse. I don't feel sorry for people like Britney Spears. She courts it. She thrives on it. People liked HL and his ex moved to Brooklyn to get away from that and to raise their daughter in a normal place.

Now, even though this is a private moment and a private tragedy for his family and friends, they will share his death and their sadness with millions of people. The only good part of that is that the people they are sharing it with, for the most, truly mourn his passing. I know I do. I already had 10 Things I Hate About You on my list of DVDs to buy this year and was planning on replacing my VHS copy of The Patriot with a DVD this year if I could get it for cheap, but now I definitely will, maybe even this weekend. I want to pay my own tribute to him, even if it's something as stupid as watching a movie of his I liked. And I don't want to intrude on his family's grief. But I hope that they take comfort from the fact that so many people liked and enjoyed his talent and that we all feel a little bereft now that he's gone.